Trip reports

6 September 2023 — 2.5 mg

Shortly after smoking it I perceived uniform synchronisation across the ‘body-mind’. I could tell that I wouldn’t be able to talk during the process as the voice was consumed by empty consciousness. And then it was a pretty smooth but very rapid ascent to a state of white homogenising mind. The sense of time felt like it was collapsing in on itself, or put another way the window of conceivable time was quite closed, but not entirely.

I didn’t feel any personal, historical content come up, nor even really any body purification. By mouth opened approaching the peak and there was a reassuring ‘ahhhh’ I gave myself. It had a slight hint of 2nd jhana sukka for a moment, but that levelled out to more neutral equanimity.

I think I remember the white realm seeming quite flat, actually.

Even though full symmetry and cessation didn’t occur there was a sense of not needing it to, because I already understood its possibility.

Coming down I felt very clear and unified in thought and that if given any question I would do my best to answer it as honestly as I could. To contrast that to my more default state, there is less agreement within the mind compared to that state, which leads to less cleanly directed responses.

When I was ready to open my eyes and look at the tracer tool, it took me a long time to process what I was seeing and be able to talk about it. I concluded that I was seeing a monochromatic blue tracer (full ball), but there was another tracer of just the outer rim of the ball which was rainbow coloured, it lasted just a fraction of the time the other tracers lasted.

9 September 2023 — 0.5-1 mg

Tried at night with Asher. We both did about 0.5-1 mg almost simultaneously. He smoked first then passed it to me and then I smoked.

It was honestly very unpleasant. Lots of dissonance. It made my tinnitus worse which was alarming and uncomfortable. It felt like it just introduced a bunch of energy into the body which then was flowing around unwieldy, like an electrical current that couldn’t get grounded. And this uncomfortable feeling persisted long after the experience. It was like having a lot of anxious, nervous energy without any stressful thoughts.

Not wanting to end on a bad note, I did another round of 1.5-2 mg. I played some green noise in the background hoping it may cover up the tinnitus. This time was a little nicer, but still had a lot of disruptive energy which was trying to ‘wiggle’ out and send it out of my body. The tinnitus was present again.

Some takeaways are that it seems like 5-MeO doesn’t want to be examined with a scrupulous mind and that the low doses don’t have enough energy to harmonise.